🏵DEAR DARCY 🏵
I had a best friend totally screw me over and as much as I try, I seem to not be able to get over it. Darcy can you help me on what I should do ?
~Tim Levinson of Connell, Washington (via email)
Well Tim first and foremost I’m really sorry that you had a best friend do that to you that is really a shame. 🙁
Just to let you know that I’ve had this happen to me in my life, so I really know how you feel. You have to sit there and know that it’s their problem not yours. You need to move on and not look back.
I’ll give you an example: I had an ex-assistant who I thought was like my sister. She worked for me for many years and I help her looking her best, I bought her clothes, bought her gifts ,went above and beyond to invite her to my family holidays as well as I even let her stay at my house when she was having some difficulty with the roommate that she was living with. I did all these things and then found out that she was basically not the person who I thought she was. The interesting thing was, because of the person who I am, other people that she knew really respected me. Other people around her came forward to tell me things that she was doing that were not right. On top of her being extremely manipulative and catching her in a bunch of lies, I finally confronted her, and then nipped it in the bud and ended the friendship. I told her I never wanted to see her again, but before she left ,I laid into her and let her know exactly how I felt.
Sometimes when I get angry, some people say to me, “Why do you have to have the last word, and why do you have to go there”. I’m the type of person that I won’t start a fight,( I try to do everything I can to be nice), but if somebody pushes me I will definitely end it, if you know what I mean. The badger in me comes out and it is not pretty at all. I’ve actually had people that are pro- football players that were scared of me when I got that mad. LOL (It’s pretty funny. ) I will not back down and I will let the person know that that what they’re doing is offensive or rude , so that I can move on in my life and not ever wonder if I should have said this or should have done that.
You can’t let someone who you thought was a friend mess you up to move forward in your life. You have to look at it as, it’s their loss and the karma will come around to them. I’ve seen it time and time again and it always does. So my suggestion is cut off all contact with this person and try to distract your mind into positive things such as watching funny and inspirational movies and television shows. I would also get out and start meeting new people and look for that special someone who would be the best friend you deserve that will be an honest person with integrity.
Like l said Tim, it happened to me, and all l can say is that I’ve got a better person than I could have ever imagined or prayed for.
Just know that a lot of times when something like that happens, it means that person was only there for a certain chapter in your life and now you need to start a new chapter with someone new.
Hope that helps Tim, and I wish you all the best!
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